Lasting Legacies
by wackyjacqs
Summary: According to some sources, today is 'Plan Your Epitaph Day', and one member of SG-1 decides to embrace the bizarre holiday more than the rest. Set S1. Oneshot. Slight S/J.


**A/N: ****Plan Your Epitaph Day: One member of SG-1 embraces the bizarre holiday more than the others. **

**There is a little discrepancy with this holiday and when it actually takes place. Some say it's in April, others say it is today (2 November). Since Halloween has just passed, I've opted for the latter date for this little story. So… today is supposedly 'Plan Your Epitaph Day'. A little morose, I know, but it is an actual thing.**

**This is set in Season 1 – any time after the events of 'Hathor', but before 'Solitudes'. Slight S/J. This hasn't been beta read, so any mistakes are mine. **

* * *

**Lasting Legacies (or Plan Your Epitaph Day - 2 November, 1997)**

* * *

"Whatcha readin', Teal'c?" Jack O'Neill asked as he set his food-laden tray down on the table. Sliding into the chair opposite his teammate, he picked up a fork and began to eat.

SG-1 had been going on missions through the gate for just over two months now. In that time, they had suffered losses, made a potential new ally in the Nox and pissed off more than one Goa'uld.

When the team wasn't on a mission, they had also started to spend their downtime together. It was just something that seemed to happen naturally and helped them bond. It also served as the perfect opportunity to introduce Teal'c to the customs of his new home.

The Jaffa had initially surprised everyone with his strong desire to learn as much as possible about Earth and its people, so as soon as he had been granted permission to leave the base, the remaining members of SG-1 took him sightseeing.

They also answered any questions their friend had regarding Earth-related matters; the Colonel had acquired a small television and DVD player for Teal'c's base quarters where Star Wars had now become regular viewing, while Daniel continued to keep him supplied with a steady stream of books. It therefore didn't surprise Jack when he found the Jaffa continuing to read intently in the middle of the Commissary.

Leaning forward to rest his forearms on the table, Jack studied the man opposite as he waited for an answer. He was about to repeat the question when Teal'c spoke, his eyes never leaving the page.

"On Chulak it is customary to celebrate important milestones throughout one's lifetime."

"Yeah, we do that here too. Y'know, births, marriages... sometimes deaths," Jack finished quietly.

"Indeed. After speaking with Daniel Jackson about the customs of the Tau'ri, he suggested this reference book would be most insightful," Teal'c added, turning the page.

Jack swallowed the mouthful of food he was eating before he spoke.

"Oh yeah? Whatcha got there?" he asked, gesturing to the book with his fork.

His friend had yet to look up from said book, which peaked Jack's attention. Sitting straighter in the chair, Jack reached out with his left arm to tilt the book higher so he could see the title. His fingers only managed to brush the top corner when Teal'c looked at him, eyebrow raised in displeasure. The Colonel's fingers hovered in the air for a moment longer before he slowly curled his fingers and let his arm fall back to the table. Offering a sheepish smile, he tried another way.

"Do you feel like telling me what your book says?"

Teal'c dipped his head slightly.

"Indeed, O'Neill. It is called '365 Holidays You Never Knew Existed'."

Jack's eyebrows shot up. "Come again?"

"It has proved most informative with regards to the celebrations on this planet. Although there are a number of terms I am unfamiliar with," the Jaffa added.

"Yeah, well, I'm not much for parties, so I'll pass," Jack grumbled as he shoved a forkful of mashed potatoes in his mouth.

Teal'c continued to talk regardless. "For example, why do humans insist on having a significant number of days dedicated to different variations of pie?"

Eyes widening at the word 'pie', the Colonel refocused on what his teammate was saying.

"Can pie only be consumed on certain days of the year, O'Neill?"

"Nope, it can be eaten anytime. See," he said with a boyish grin as he lifted a large slice of apple pie from his tray. "_Pie!_"

"It therefore appears fruitless to celebrate this edible material when it can be consumed every day of the year, does it not?"

Jack frowned. "Uh... maybe? Doesn't everyone like pie?"

As Teal'c stared, Jack sighed. "Oh. You want a proper answer?"

Clearing his throat, Jack continued. "Right. Maybe it's a special day because... uh... that was the date it was first made, or something important happened to the pie, or... yeah, or maybe the local Mayor liked it so much he declared it an official 'Happy Whatever Pie Day'..."

Seeing Teal'c begin to frown, Jack trailed off. "Ask Daniel," he finally shrugged, before stabbing his potatoes with the fork once more.

The two men fell into comfortable silence for a few minutes when Jack pushed his tray to the side. Pursing his lips, he glanced around the Commissary before nonchalantly asking, "So, is that what today is - some sort of 'pie' day?"

"No."

"Ah." A moment passed when he started to drum his fingers on the tabletop. "So, if we're not celebrating pie..." Jack said, waving his hand around, "We're celebrating -"

"Plan Your Epitaph Day."

Jack's eyes widened. Whatever he had expected his friend to say that certainly hadn't been it. He opened and closed his mouth a few times before he could string a sentence together.

"Plan your epitaph day. That's not creepy at all," he muttered.

* * *

_Two hours later..._

"Jack! You can't write that!" Daniel exclaimed as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Why not?" he replied defensively.

The archeologist dropped his arm to his side and stared at the older man in disbelief. He lifted the page he was clutching in his other hand and began to read.

"Here lies Teal'c. Sick I have become, old and weak... When 900 years old you reach, look as good you will not?"

"What's your point?"

"For one, how do you explain the whole 900-years-old statement?"

"Easy." Jack turned to the Jaffa sitting beside him as they sat at the bench in Daniel's lab. "You're like, what... almost a hundred?"

"I am 98 years of age, O'Neill."

Smirking, Jack turned back to Daniel. "See? And he doesn't look a day over 35. He's well on his way to reaching the big 9-0-0."

Daniel shook his head in disbelief. "Okay... I'm pretty sure Star Wars has the copyright for the rest of it."

Jack shrugged. "Who's going to argue; it's not like Teal'c will be around to defend its use. No offence, T," Jack added hastily. "And we'll all be long gone, so..."

"This is morose," Daniel muttered as Jack continued to defend his chosen epitaph for Teal'c. He closed his eyes and slowly counted to ten. "I can't believe we're even having this conversation."

"What conversation?" came the voice of Sam Carter from the doorway. Moving towards her teammates she greeted them. "Colonel. Teal'c. Daniel."

"Carter."

"Captain Carter."

"Sam."

"So, what's the conversation," she repeated with a smile as she came to a stop beside her Commanding Officer.

"Jack was -"

"Nothing," Jack finished, cutting off Daniel. He started shoving his doodle-filled pages into an unkempt pile, but froze momentarily as Teal'c spoke.

"O'Neill and Daniel Jackson were debating the complications of my epitaph."

Sam's mouth fell open at his words. Glancing between the two men in question - one looking exasperated and the other looking sheepish - she snapped her mouth closed and frowned.

"Uh, why... exactly? Sir?"

Jack swept his arm towards Teal'c as if that explained everything.

"Today is 'Plan Your Epitaph Day'," Daniel offered.

Sam nodded slowly. "Oh."

"O'Neill has kindly offered to plan our epitaphs for us," Teal'c added.

She raised an eyebrow and looked at the Colonel.

"With all due respect, Sir, don't you have paperwork to do?"

He threw an unamused glare in her direction and she mumbled a quick apology.

"Speaking of paperwork," Daniel said casually, "What's all that," he asked, pointing to the stack of pages now firmly jammed under the Colonel's right elbow.

Jack involuntarily straightened. "Nuthin'."

Daniel squinted, his eyebrows furrowing behind the rim of his glasses as he studied the team leader. At the same time, Sam leaned forward in an attempt to see what was written on the pages, when Jack spoke again. His eyes were fully trained on the archeologist as they tried to outstare each other, but his words were directed at Sam.

"_Easy_, Captain."

Straightening, Sam nodded and took a half step back. After staring for a few moments longer, Daniel looked away first. Sighing heavily, he crossed his arms in front of chest.

"It's the other epitaphs you've written, isn't it?"

"No," Jack said, wincing immediately at the lack of conviction behind his answer.

"Are you going to share with the rest of us?" Daniel continued, as he took a step closer to the bench, the look in his eye daring Jack to challenge him.

Jack stole a sideways glance at Sam. "Uh... "

Studying each of his teammates in turn before focusing on the pages, Jack tilted his head as he decided what to do. Slowly, a grin spread across his face and he met Daniel's gaze.

"Yours is a doozy," he said, his amusement evident as he rummaged through the sheets in front of him.

Finding what he needed, he thrust the page into the younger man's face. Daniel reached up to take it, regarding their team leader warily the whole time. He frowned as he tried to decipher the Colonel's scribbled writing.

"Here lies Daniel Jackson..."

He trailed off and his eyes snapped to Jack.

"What's the next part supposed to mean?" he asked indignantly.

Jack shrugged, a grin still plastered on his face.

"Let's face it Danny Boy... out of all of us, you _are_ the one who seems to attract trouble."

"But... this... you can't..." He stuttered, waving the page around.

"What does it say?" Sam asked.

Jack sat straighter and answered her question proudly.

"Here lies Daniel Jackson. They told me not to touch anything."

Ripples of laughter escaped the woman causing Jack to stare at her wide-eyed. He'd never heard her laugh like that before... and he quite liked the sound of it. He frowned slightly as he realized that should bother him more than it was, but before he could dwell on the issue, the Captain spoke.

"I'm sorry Daniel, but the Colonel's right."

Muttering something under his breath, Sam pulled a face at his reaction. She went to apologize again when Daniel spoke.

"What about Sam? You're _bound _to have something written for her," he said, looking pointedly at Jack.

"_Daniel_," he warned.

"Sir?"

Jack didn't answer, instead listening to his inner voice scream '_crap, crap, crap,_' over and over again.

"Sir."

He turned slowly to his Captain as he thought about what he could say to get out of it. Should he tell the truth... or not.

_Not. _

"Uh, well, y'see Captain... I, uh, I didn't get a chance to write... anything... for you..."

He pretended not to notice her expression falter slightly, or her eyes lose a little sparkle at his confession.

"Oh."

He hesitated. "Did you want -"

His next words were cut off as Daniel snatched a page from the top of the pile of papers.

"Here lies Captain Samantha Carter. Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world."

"Gimme that," Jack growled, snatching the page back and crumpling it into a ball.

Silence fell in the room, no one quite sure who - if any of them - should speak first. After what felt like an eternity, Sam's soft voice broke the tension.

"Uh, that was..." She frowned as she tried to think of a fitting word.

"Inappropriate, Captain. I know - " Colonel O'Neill said.

" - Sweet," Sam cut in simultaneously.

"I'll understand if you..." Jack froze and then frowned in confusion. "Excuse me?"

"Well," Sam began, grimacing slightly as her voice wavered, and Jack was a little surprised when a pink flush appeared on her cheeks.

"That's one of my favorite quotes, Sir," she said softly.

Her CO's features softened as her words hit him and he tried to think of an appropriate response, when Daniel started complaining.

"How come Sam gets a nice epitaph? No offence Sam," he added quickly when she voiced her protest.

"Because she's _nice_," Jack growled at Daniel, eliciting a soft gasp from the woman in question. At the same time, Teal'c reached over to take the pages lying in front of O'Neill and he started to read. After a moment, the Jaffa spoke.

"Have you not composed an epitaph for yourself, O'Neill?"

"Uh..." Jack scratched his right temple. "I didn't really give too much thought to mine. As long as it's not on some godforsaken desert planet, or I'm turned into a frozen popsicle of some kind, I'm easy," he answered honestly with a shrug.

He glanced around at his strange assortment of teammates. His eyes fell on Sam. She tilted her head to the side, a soft smile gracing her lips.

"In that case, we'll do our best to make sure that doesn't happen. Sir," she added belatedly.

Jack's heart fluttered in his chest and he felt himself returning her smile.

"That's good to know. Captain," he said quietly.

He was then rewarded with one of her megawatt smiles and he felt his heart slam into his chest. Suddenly, he thought he might need an epitaph sooner than he realized.

Sam Carter wasn't good for his health; that much was quickly becoming evident. As Jack cleared his throat, he held her eyes for a moment longer and he immediately knew what his epitaph would say.

'Here lies Colonel Jack O'Neill. Death by Sam Carter.'

He grinned softly.

He supposed there was always worse ways to go.

* * *

**A/N: Part of Teal'c's epitaph is a quote from one of the Star Wars movie. The great one, Yoda, said it, while Sam's is a quote by Harriet Tubman.**


End file.
